How To Talk To Kids About Sex

By in Parenting on 30 May 2009

Most parents dread the time when their kids will finally ask about sex. But children are inherently inquisitive, and they will definitely begin to ask questions long before you are ready. To effectively talk to your kids about sex, it is important for parents to do some kind of preparation. This is crucial because the way you discuss the topic can greatly affect their attitude towards sex and even their sexuality as a whole. Children are bound to hear or learn about sex from other people, and it is best that you provide accurate information before they start to seek it elsewhere.

Many experts suggest that the best time to start talking to kids about sex is during their preteen years.  But if your child has started to ask you about sex at an earlier age, it may be good if you can slowly start educating him about it. Bear in mind that the “sex talk” should be a continuing process, and it should not be something that is done in one or two sessions only.

Your kids will have very specific questions, and you may use these as cues as to what you need to divulge. Base your answers on your child’s developmental stage and the values that you want to impart. Children below six years old can easily be satisfied with a simple answer. Don’t go into the details about lovemaking, but instead focus on a simple explanation of the process of fertilization.

Tell your kids that when a sperm unites with an egg, a baby can grow inside a mother’s womb. Although this may seem unconvincing, young kids are generally satisfied with brief explanations. It may also help if you can support your teaching with age-appropriate books to further illustrate the concept.

If you feel awkward and unsure about talking to your older child, it may help if you practice and read more about the issue. At this time, it is already necessary to discuss sexual intercourse including the emotional and physical aspects involved with the act. It is also very important to tackle other related topics like sexuality, sexual behaviour, pregnancy, contraception, sexually transmitted diseases, and even peer pressure. It is also vital that you uphold the right values because it can have an impact on your child’s future decisions.

Encourage your child to ask questions, and try to determine whether there is a need to give further details about a particular concept. You can also use other methods of teaching to illustrate a point. Use age-appropriate educational materials to augment the concepts that you have talked about.

Although sex education is now being taught in schools, parents should never use it as an excuse for putting off the discussion with their kids. According to studies, teens wait out longer to have sex when they can discuss the matter with their parents. The study also found that talking to kids about sex can lead to responsible sexual behavior. You will surely have plenty of concerns once your child begins to ask about sex. But if you choose to be part of your child’s learning experience, you are helping him make morally sound and responsible decisions later in life.


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