Parenting is an enriching journey that evolves through time. There are days when you can effectively deal with your kids’ behavior, while there are also days when you find yourself on the verge of losing control. Although it is the nature of kids to be adorable, there are just instances when they can get on your nerves. With the pressures of everyday life and with the responsibility of rearing children, anger is just inevitable.
Anger is not entirely bad as opposed to what many individuals may perceive it to be. It is actually a natural and healthy emotion that can even be helpful when it is properly expressed. Anger can actually trigger a natural response to perceived threats, and it can also stimulate an individual to come up with potential solutions to a problem.
For many individuals, the problem actually lies on how they deal with their anger. If your stubborn toddler refuses to listen and continues to yell incessantly, do you act on impulse and engage in a shouting match with him? If so, you may be allowing your anger to get the best of you.
If you can’t appropriately deal with your temper, you may end up having problems with other people at work, or with other members of your community in general. Furthermore, your relationship with the members of your family may also be strained. Thus, managing your anger in an effective way is essential, so that your kids will also learn how to do the same.
An age-old approach used by parents on kids is to tell them to count to ten before they even speak. This advice has actually withstood the test of time, and it can be effective for adults too. When you are angry, you actually have a choice whether you will react immediately, or you will respond appropriately at the right time. The main difference lies on how you can clearly think about your response to any given situation.
This explains why counting and taking deep breaths in between is a good way to deal with anger. It actually takes your mind away from the triggering event, which allows you to better control your initial reaction. The time factor is very important in dealing with anger because it gives you a chance to think of positive ways to respond.
Gaining control when you are on the edge of losing your temper may be difficult. But it takes practice to get used to the principle of taking time before responding. If you find yourself in a situation in which clear thinking is not yet possible, it may be best to leave for awhile so you can calm down. Bear in mind that you are not suppressing your anger, but you are instead giving yourself much needed time to clear your head.
Choose the time to talk when you are ready to examine those feelings, and openly talk about it with the persons involved. Make sure that you also listen to their explanations, so that after everything is clear, you can then learn how to forget and let go. Although kids may still not think the way adults do, you also need to examine their thoughts so they can explain their actions.
Responding positively to anger is a skill that can be learned through time. It is necessary for parents to work on anger management because it is a life skill that kids need to learn too. Through proper guidance and by being a good role model, you are gradually preparing your kids for greater things ahead.