There are countless resources that one can read up regarding pregnancy and the changes that go along with it. These write-ups oftentimes try to accurately portray what a pregnant mother feels, everything from a physical and emotional standpoint. But words can only say so much. There is no better literature to accurately portray pregnancy than what an actual experience brings. And in my case, all these experiences are magnified by the fact that I am carrying twins!
It has been months since I first caught a glimpse of my two angels by ultrasound, but I still find it hard to believe. But the physical signs cannot be denied. My tummy is much larger than what is normally expected from a singleton pregnancy. It has grown so much that I marveled at the sight of how my body is trying to accommodate the growing babies. Of course, the stretch marks are inevitable. It is like they’ve been printed all over my tummy, looking like webs in different directions and of varying colors. No lotion or any specialized cream can have the power to stop this natural adaptive change in my skin. Definitely, my skin has to be stretched to the greatest possible extent to provide enough space for my twins to grow.
With the large size of my tummy, most people who see me and don’t know that
I’m carrying twins think that I’m only counting days to my due date. They are surprised to learn that I actually still have a month and a half before I can finally see my twin baby boys.
The past months had not been easy both physically and emotionally. Everyday is a constant struggle to give out my best for my babies. I diligently carry out routine and deemed important self-care such as daily bath, multivitamin intake, and ample rest, even if at times I feel listless to do so. There are times when my appetite for food is terrible due to a cold or flu, but then again, I must compel myself to eat so as not to compromise my babies’ nutrition. At certain times too, my body is unreasonably tired that I feel my muscles could not bear the increasing weight. My muscles and joints feel weak and I couldn’t stand or move at once.
Now that I am entering the last 6 weeks of my pregnancy, I am experiencing more difficult and exhausting physical demands. I can not afford to stand still for more than 10 minutes or walk around for more than 5 minutes, or else my hips sore and my tummy feels so heavy and hard that I’m afraid I might have premature contractions. I can not eat as much as I would want to in one setting. I have to moderate the volume of food I have to eat because a full stomach can only give me a labored breathing afterwards. And if I should sit, I sit with my back inclined at 30 degree angle so as to increase the surface area for my tummy. What could be worse than the above discomforts already mentioned, is the fact that there is not even a single sleeping position that can give me the best relaxing sleep all through the night. I am always restless, resulting to sleep deprivation and drowsiness the following day.
On the other hand, by this time also, my babies are becoming more revealing of their presence. Their kicks and punches are more discrete. I might not know who among them is gleefully moving inside my tummy, but I can definitely tell which part of their body moves. Honestly, there’s a different kind of joy that I feel inside when I see my tummy waves in and out, sometimes getting deformed as my babies move inside.
With all the seemingly unbearable discomforts that I have to go though for the next couple of weeks, I ponder on the little joys that I am experiencing everyday with my twins. I am personally convinced that perhaps the reason why my babies’ movements become more and more sensible and discrete as I hurdle over the discomforts, is to inspire me to look forward and persevere with joy in my heart this difficult stage of my life.